The Dixlexicon et al
Hi, Here is an attempt at the full version of the post "More on the Dixlexicon" or whatever the sub it was called:
With the unofficial third edition of Beavish slowly being distributed amongst my circle of friends in Brisbane and beyond, I thought it was high time for another blog. But there won't be any stories today, just some general clearing of the air about certain things that have arisen since last I posted. There has been some debate amongst my friends and people who have left comments in the guest book about whether or not Beavish is a dialect or if it is slang. This suggests that people are really starting to think about Beavish and take it seriously, which leaves two options:
1. Get a life.
2. Join us as we debate things important to our wider world, or that which amuses us and gives us pleasure while we try to sort the stresses of the modern world into manageable bites so we can "chow down" on life without indigestion.
Taking one of the above two options depends on whether you think Beavish is full of subs and that my friends and myself are arschwangers. As for the dialect/slang argument, my opinion was that it was always slang. However, this was before the words and phrases we devised started to multiply at a rapid rate unforseen when we started this holy barmera. (NOTE: A comment on the half-published "More on the Dixlexicon and Other Matters" suggested the term "slanguage", instead of slang or dialect, which I mightily endorse). Now, I believe it is possible for Beavisians to construct a story that is unintelligible to anyone who does not know parts of the language. In fact, I now ask for people to give me a short, basic story via the guest book, and myself and other Beavisians will attempt to reconstruct it using Beavish and publish some of the results on this blog.
The Dixlexicon - The Language of Love
Some have also asked about the Dixlexicon, Beavish's very own Language of Love. Although, as Beavish is still in the very early stages, the love is rather superficial and could, for now, be more accurately described as the "Language of Lust". Well, here is more about that: The Dixlexicon is named after the Beavish word "dixlexic". When Beavish was in its early days, my friend Joel informed me that his brother had made a humorous (perhaps Freudian) slip of the tongue, saying "Oh man, I am so dixlexic." Joel told me delightedly that there had to be a place in Beavish for this term. Taking the crude term for penis - dick - I came with a definition that suggests someone who is dixlexic is a man who is a little worried about a relationship. Soon it emerged that there could be three meanings:
1. The habit of having really screwed relationships with the more feminine sex.
2. Having mixed feelings about a romantic entanglement – one that you are currently in or thinking about being in.
3. Generally bad luck in romantic relationships or feeling bad about the whole love thing.
A Disclaimer
Before I carry on with this dixlexic state of the nation, I figure it is high lemon and lime to add a disclaimer and put out a call for contributions at the same time. I realise that this new slanguage is rather phallocentric to the point where I have even named the Dixlexicon - Language of Love - after a male-specific phrase. I am sure Lacan would take out his pipe at this stage and nod sagely as though this was something he knew would happen, and he had just been waiting for it to do so. So I am calling on everyone tocontribute female versions of some of the phallocentric words and phrases included in Beavish.
Wasabi Talk
Continuing along the line of lexicography is the term "sexy lexis". Lexis refers to words used in a language and can be defined by nouns, verbs etc. If someone has a sexy lexis, they often speak in language which people find very interesting, perhaps in an erotic way or more likely in a way that makes you get a little bit afraid and a little bit courageous every time you see them. Maybe it is poetic or direct, it depends on the person. Similarly, sexy lexis is also used to describe someone who has a voice that attracts. For example, my parents met in the theatre (it was a murder play and Mum played the murderer and Dad the victim) and my mother has told me that it was Dad's deep and resonating voice that first attracted her to him. She had not seen him at that point, when she did see him she might have "had a perve at Merv". Similarly, on first seeing my mother, my father might have "had a gander at Amanda".
If you do have a gander/perve and what you see really "pours your tea" (easy, goldfish!), then you might like to describe your sights using some of the following terms. You might say "She/he is wasabi!" Which means they are extremely attractive or "hot" - it is named after a situation where someone I know ate sushi and discovered what that green paste tasted like. Alternatively, a woman who is sweet, possibly naive but is undeniably stunning (and often a teacher of some sort) is called a Jenny Bunn, named after the main character in Kingsley Amis' Take A Girl Like You. If you see someone and you really don't like the look of them at all, you might consider them to be a Liz Hurley. You can use that for men and women, as the Beavish term for vomiting is Liz Hurley.
If you want to rate all these people that you meet - either on a superficial basis or something a little deeper (who are all these people you meet, anyway? You goldfish, you) - you might like to use the Cheese Scale. The Cheese Scale works on the basis of rating a person's attractiveness with a type of cheese, whether it be tasty, mild, cheddar, vintage or something else. Cheese lovers could have a shining lemon coming up with various ratings of attractiveness if they put their mind to it.
There are some other terms in the dixlexicon that I think are worth examining. We haven't come up with a worthy definition of llama sutra, but I am sure it means something quite interesting. Carnal ignorance is something of which all good unmarried Christians no doubt have experience, while a man who puts his cannon on the counter is not someone who is carnally ignorant at all. In fact, a man who puts his cannon on the counter quite possibly has too many potatoes on the boil.
Unfortunately, because I have been turkey scratching for quite some time (see my blog "Enter the Turkey Scratch Into the Dixlexicon"), I have not yet had the correct language acquisition to cover all areas of the dixlexicon, namely the more wonderful parts of love. I think perhaps that those who have had some experience in this world should put forth their contributions. Maybe I can call upon my fellow Beavisians, Paul and Beth (check out Beth's Beavish Exposed blog, in particular her definition of flogging the bat), to help me out as recently they have decided to tie the full bowtie knot. Congrats to you two, your news was lemon butter to my ears. I would also like to thank Paul and Beth for their outstanding number of contributions to Beavish over the last few months.
Until next time - so long!
PS Hopefully this time the blog will work.
Glossary of Beavish learned today:
Sub - A generic curse.
Chow down - Eat.
Full of subs - Someone who is not to be trusted, perhaps one who indulges too much and generally annoying.
Arschwanger - Someone who's speech is full of excrement.
Barmera - 1. A bookfest or sale of some kind. 2. A celebration.
State of the nation - Conversation.
Lemon and lime - Time.
Dixlexic - 1. The habit of having really screwed relationships with the more feminine sex. 2. Having mixed feelings about a romantic entanglement – one that you are currently in or thinking about being in. 3. Generally bad luck in romantic relationships or feeling bad about the whole love thing.
Sexy lexis - 1. A delicious choice in words. 2. A sexy voice.
Have a gander at Amanda - Check out the ladies.
Have a perve at Merv - Check out the gentlemen.
"She/he really (knows how to) pour/s my tea" - 1. She/he is someone who I find very attractive. 2. She/he is someone who treats me very well indeed.
"Easy, goldfish!" - Settle down, my good fellow. An alternative to the generic "Easy, tiger!"
Wasabi - 1. Hot. 2. Hot in terms of attractiveness.
Jenny Bunn - An extremely attractive but also very sweet and warm young woman, possibly naive, usually a primary school teacher or a teacher of some sort. Name taken from the main character in Kingsley Amis' Take A Girl Like You.
Liz Hurley - 1. To throw-up or vomit. 2. An unnattractive person.
Cheese Scale - A scale of rating the attractiveness of people, whether it be mild, cheddar, vintage, tasty or some other form of cheese.
Shining lemon - Good time. An attempt at complex grammar using Beavish. "Shining" is derived from the Beavish expression "shining armour" meaning "good night" and "lemon" is a shortened version on "lemon and lime", Beavish rhyming slang for time.
Shining armour - Good night.
Llama Sutra - The jury is still conferring as to a definitive definition on this one.
Carnal Ignorance - The opposite of carnal knowledge.
"Put your cannon on the counter" - A literal translation is too coarse, but a man who "puts his cannon on the counter" is an immoral fellow, a cad who gets around with multiple intimate partners.
Too many potatoes on the boil - 1. A person who has more than one romantic interest at a time, but in a less specific way than someone who puts their cannon on the counter. 2. Having too many things to do at once.
Turkey scratch - To feel lonely.
Flogging the bat - To feel bad about a situation in which someone feels a certain way but in which you cannot reciprocate. (see Beth's Beavish Exposed blog).
Tie the full bowtie knot - To get married.
Lemon butter - Nice in a lovely sort of way.
With the unofficial third edition of Beavish slowly being distributed amongst my circle of friends in Brisbane and beyond, I thought it was high time for another blog. But there won't be any stories today, just some general clearing of the air about certain things that have arisen since last I posted. There has been some debate amongst my friends and people who have left comments in the guest book about whether or not Beavish is a dialect or if it is slang. This suggests that people are really starting to think about Beavish and take it seriously, which leaves two options:
1. Get a life.
2. Join us as we debate things important to our wider world, or that which amuses us and gives us pleasure while we try to sort the stresses of the modern world into manageable bites so we can "chow down" on life without indigestion.
Taking one of the above two options depends on whether you think Beavish is full of subs and that my friends and myself are arschwangers. As for the dialect/slang argument, my opinion was that it was always slang. However, this was before the words and phrases we devised started to multiply at a rapid rate unforseen when we started this holy barmera. (NOTE: A comment on the half-published "More on the Dixlexicon and Other Matters" suggested the term "slanguage", instead of slang or dialect, which I mightily endorse). Now, I believe it is possible for Beavisians to construct a story that is unintelligible to anyone who does not know parts of the language. In fact, I now ask for people to give me a short, basic story via the guest book, and myself and other Beavisians will attempt to reconstruct it using Beavish and publish some of the results on this blog.
The Dixlexicon - The Language of Love
Some have also asked about the Dixlexicon, Beavish's very own Language of Love. Although, as Beavish is still in the very early stages, the love is rather superficial and could, for now, be more accurately described as the "Language of Lust". Well, here is more about that: The Dixlexicon is named after the Beavish word "dixlexic". When Beavish was in its early days, my friend Joel informed me that his brother had made a humorous (perhaps Freudian) slip of the tongue, saying "Oh man, I am so dixlexic." Joel told me delightedly that there had to be a place in Beavish for this term. Taking the crude term for penis - dick - I came with a definition that suggests someone who is dixlexic is a man who is a little worried about a relationship. Soon it emerged that there could be three meanings:
1. The habit of having really screwed relationships with the more feminine sex.
2. Having mixed feelings about a romantic entanglement – one that you are currently in or thinking about being in.
3. Generally bad luck in romantic relationships or feeling bad about the whole love thing.
A Disclaimer
Before I carry on with this dixlexic state of the nation, I figure it is high lemon and lime to add a disclaimer and put out a call for contributions at the same time. I realise that this new slanguage is rather phallocentric to the point where I have even named the Dixlexicon - Language of Love - after a male-specific phrase. I am sure Lacan would take out his pipe at this stage and nod sagely as though this was something he knew would happen, and he had just been waiting for it to do so. So I am calling on everyone tocontribute female versions of some of the phallocentric words and phrases included in Beavish.
Wasabi Talk
Continuing along the line of lexicography is the term "sexy lexis". Lexis refers to words used in a language and can be defined by nouns, verbs etc. If someone has a sexy lexis, they often speak in language which people find very interesting, perhaps in an erotic way or more likely in a way that makes you get a little bit afraid and a little bit courageous every time you see them. Maybe it is poetic or direct, it depends on the person. Similarly, sexy lexis is also used to describe someone who has a voice that attracts. For example, my parents met in the theatre (it was a murder play and Mum played the murderer and Dad the victim) and my mother has told me that it was Dad's deep and resonating voice that first attracted her to him. She had not seen him at that point, when she did see him she might have "had a perve at Merv". Similarly, on first seeing my mother, my father might have "had a gander at Amanda".
If you do have a gander/perve and what you see really "pours your tea" (easy, goldfish!), then you might like to describe your sights using some of the following terms. You might say "She/he is wasabi!" Which means they are extremely attractive or "hot" - it is named after a situation where someone I know ate sushi and discovered what that green paste tasted like. Alternatively, a woman who is sweet, possibly naive but is undeniably stunning (and often a teacher of some sort) is called a Jenny Bunn, named after the main character in Kingsley Amis' Take A Girl Like You. If you see someone and you really don't like the look of them at all, you might consider them to be a Liz Hurley. You can use that for men and women, as the Beavish term for vomiting is Liz Hurley.
If you want to rate all these people that you meet - either on a superficial basis or something a little deeper (who are all these people you meet, anyway? You goldfish, you) - you might like to use the Cheese Scale. The Cheese Scale works on the basis of rating a person's attractiveness with a type of cheese, whether it be tasty, mild, cheddar, vintage or something else. Cheese lovers could have a shining lemon coming up with various ratings of attractiveness if they put their mind to it.
There are some other terms in the dixlexicon that I think are worth examining. We haven't come up with a worthy definition of llama sutra, but I am sure it means something quite interesting. Carnal ignorance is something of which all good unmarried Christians no doubt have experience, while a man who puts his cannon on the counter is not someone who is carnally ignorant at all. In fact, a man who puts his cannon on the counter quite possibly has too many potatoes on the boil.
Unfortunately, because I have been turkey scratching for quite some time (see my blog "Enter the Turkey Scratch Into the Dixlexicon"), I have not yet had the correct language acquisition to cover all areas of the dixlexicon, namely the more wonderful parts of love. I think perhaps that those who have had some experience in this world should put forth their contributions. Maybe I can call upon my fellow Beavisians, Paul and Beth (check out Beth's Beavish Exposed blog, in particular her definition of flogging the bat), to help me out as recently they have decided to tie the full bowtie knot. Congrats to you two, your news was lemon butter to my ears. I would also like to thank Paul and Beth for their outstanding number of contributions to Beavish over the last few months.
Until next time - so long!
PS Hopefully this time the blog will work.
Glossary of Beavish learned today:
Sub - A generic curse.
Chow down - Eat.
Full of subs - Someone who is not to be trusted, perhaps one who indulges too much and generally annoying.
Arschwanger - Someone who's speech is full of excrement.
Barmera - 1. A bookfest or sale of some kind. 2. A celebration.
State of the nation - Conversation.
Lemon and lime - Time.
Dixlexic - 1. The habit of having really screwed relationships with the more feminine sex. 2. Having mixed feelings about a romantic entanglement – one that you are currently in or thinking about being in. 3. Generally bad luck in romantic relationships or feeling bad about the whole love thing.
Sexy lexis - 1. A delicious choice in words. 2. A sexy voice.
Have a gander at Amanda - Check out the ladies.
Have a perve at Merv - Check out the gentlemen.
"She/he really (knows how to) pour/s my tea" - 1. She/he is someone who I find very attractive. 2. She/he is someone who treats me very well indeed.
"Easy, goldfish!" - Settle down, my good fellow. An alternative to the generic "Easy, tiger!"
Wasabi - 1. Hot. 2. Hot in terms of attractiveness.
Jenny Bunn - An extremely attractive but also very sweet and warm young woman, possibly naive, usually a primary school teacher or a teacher of some sort. Name taken from the main character in Kingsley Amis' Take A Girl Like You.
Liz Hurley - 1. To throw-up or vomit. 2. An unnattractive person.
Cheese Scale - A scale of rating the attractiveness of people, whether it be mild, cheddar, vintage, tasty or some other form of cheese.
Shining lemon - Good time. An attempt at complex grammar using Beavish. "Shining" is derived from the Beavish expression "shining armour" meaning "good night" and "lemon" is a shortened version on "lemon and lime", Beavish rhyming slang for time.
Shining armour - Good night.
Llama Sutra - The jury is still conferring as to a definitive definition on this one.
Carnal Ignorance - The opposite of carnal knowledge.
"Put your cannon on the counter" - A literal translation is too coarse, but a man who "puts his cannon on the counter" is an immoral fellow, a cad who gets around with multiple intimate partners.
Too many potatoes on the boil - 1. A person who has more than one romantic interest at a time, but in a less specific way than someone who puts their cannon on the counter. 2. Having too many things to do at once.
Turkey scratch - To feel lonely.
Flogging the bat - To feel bad about a situation in which someone feels a certain way but in which you cannot reciprocate. (see Beth's Beavish Exposed blog).
Tie the full bowtie knot - To get married.
Lemon butter - Nice in a lovely sort of way.
posted by Lord Beavish at 10:15 pm
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